Drive
by Harmony Goldstar
Summary: Driving is a step you have to take. Getting in the car. Going out there and doing it. But it's not even your move. It's time's. Because even as you watch time takes the step for you, and you can't ever go back. You can't un-turn fifteen and a half.


**A/N: Another of my not-songfic fics based on a song. This one is based on Drive, by Alan Jackson. Hope you enjoy & please review! **

Cal pulled over and shut off the car at the end of the street.

"Here you go," he said, handing Emily the keys. They traded places, and he talked her through starting the car and shifting into drive.

"Now, keep the wheel straight, take your foot off the brake and the car will start moving."

"Okay."

"Now, since we're going straight for half a mile, push gently on the gas," Cal instructed. The car crept forward at fifteen miles an hour.

In the driver's seat, Emily was almost visibly shaking.

"Like this?" she asked.

"Yep. Good job, love."

Several minutes later, she relaxed a bit, having met no other cars.

"Okay, good job Em. Now put the directional on."

"Down for left?"

"Yes. Slow down. Now turn. Keep turning." Emily pulled the car into their driveway and put it in park. She took the keys out of the ignition and handed them back to Cal.

Gillian pulled into the driveway just as Emily got out of the car.

"Hi Gill!"

"Hi Em. Driving already?"

"Yeah. Just down the street."

"Yep! She hasn't crashed my car yet," Cal said.

"Dad!" Emily exclaimed. Cal disappeared into the house.

"So, were you nervous?" Gill asked.

"Yeah. Shaking. This was only like, my second time driving." Gillian laughed. Leave it to Cal to scare the crap out of Emily by making her drive on the road on her second day.

"It's just driving down the street. It shouldn't be that big a deal, but it is. It's like I'm on top of the world," Emily explained.

"That's great Em. It is a big deal! You're learning."

"Yeah." Emily was quite happy that Gillian had seen her get out of the driver's seat. Things like that were a big deal. When other people saw it, that made it very real.

"Driving is about change. It's a step you take and it changes everything," Gillian said.

"Sure it does—freedom," Emily said with a smile.

"When I was your age it was really scary when I first got in the car. It was a step I had to take. I was way too scared to do it, and then I realized that it wasn't really a step I could take. Time took it for me the day I turned fifteen and a half. I didn't realize it until later, but that was the step. Time took it for me, and nothing I could have done would have changed it. I couldn't un-turn fifteen and a half," Gill said.

"That really makes a lot of sense. About time and all. I wasn't so afraid of actually driving, I mean, I was, but I think it was more of a fear of being able to do it. I'm still scared every time I drive, but I'm not so afraid of it now," Emily said.

"As you get more used to it it'll get easier and less scary," Gill reassured. Then Cal returned with a bucket.

"Here you go Em. You wanted to drive; now you can wash the car."

"But Dad…"

"No buts Em. You need to learn how to take care of a car."

"Oh fine," Emily said, realizing she wasn't going to win. She took the bucket.

"Come on darling, payroll awaits," Cal said to Gillian. She smiled at him and retrieved her bag from her car before following Cal into the house.

In the driveway, Emily filled the bucket with water and watched it foam up as the soap mixed in. She sprayed the car off, and started washing. There were worse things her father could have made her do.

Fifteen minutes later, Emily washed the last of the soap suds off the car and wiped her hands on her jeans. She opened the door to the house and found Cal and Gill on the couch. Gill was sitting cross legged working on something and Cal was staring.

"I finished Dad."

"Good. Now you can wash Gill's car."

"What?! Dad!"

"Please?" Gill said, turning to give Emily puppy dog eyes that the teenager couldn't resist. "I'll take you out tomorrow if you want. You should learn to drive more than one car," Gillian said.

"Okay," Emily said, sold by the puppy dog eyes and the promise of more driving time. She returned to the driveway, and did a much better job washing Gill's car than she had for her father's. Gill's car was newer, cooler, and Emily couldn't wait to drive it.

Zoe wouldn't let Emily drive her car, said it was new, and it was Cal's job to teach Emily to drive. Driving with Gill would be so much better.

Gillian wouldn't comment every time Emily's nervousness showed while she was driving. Of course she was nervous! Driving was scary. The leading cause of death in teenagers or something like that.

When Emily returned to the house this time, she was greeted by a delicious looking meal that was not beans on toast. Her father and Gillian were standing in the kitchen having a towel fight with dirty dish towels. Emily couldn't help but laugh and Cal looked over at her. Gill took the opportunity as it was presented and swatted Cal in the face with the towel, which only made Emily laugh harder. Cal tossed his towel into the sink and pulled Gillian against him before she could hit him again. He pulled the towel out of her grasp and dropped it before kissing the corner of her mouth and taking his seat at the table.

Gillian sighed and Emily finally managed to stop laughing.

"When I was about twelve, my dad came home with a plywood boat. I helped him fix it up and get it running. We took it out to the pond by our house on good days, when he wasn't drunk. Those were some of the best memories I had of my childhood," Cal said.

"Did you get to drive the boat, Dad?"

"Yeah. It was just an old boat, but it was the greatest feeling, steering around that tiny pond. I was king of the ocean when I got to drive," Cal said. He looked at Gillian mentally pleading with her to share her first driving experience.

"I was fifteen when I got to drive," Gill said. "My dad came home towing my uncle's old truck. He fixed it up and got it working. While he was working on that truck he stayed home at night instead of going out drinking. It was a change, and my mother and I never even dared to get our hopes up that it would last, and it didn't.

"One day Dad came home from work and caught me sitting in the driver's seat. I thought I was going to get it, but instead he handed me the keys and loaded up the bed with the trash. He let me drive down back roads out to the dump. I was sitting up there smiling like an idiot. Right then, I thought that it would last, but the next night my father came home drunk again," Gill said sadly.

Cal reached across the table and took Gillian's hand in his own and Emily stood up to get the chocolate ice cream for dessert. Cal tried to look away, to not see the pain on Gillian's face. He could see that there was more to the story, but it was a story that she didn't want Emily to have to hear.

"Someday, love," he whispered to her. She nodded, and both pretended nothing had happened as Emily turned around.

"Not too much ice cream love. You can't drive tomorrow if you don't sleep tonight," Cal warned. Gillian laughed a little, and Emily smiled.


End file.
